So ... It's been a busy week

So, yeah, it's kinda obvious that it is vacation time over here. Nothing new to add in the past week. Guess I can give you another installment of "Tickle Me Tuesday"

The Sharpshooter

A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle. He goes to a rifle shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope. The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "This scope is so good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill." The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing."What's so funny?" asks the clerk."I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house." the man replies. The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house. Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets, I'll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife's head off and shoot the guy's dick off." The man takes another look through the scope and says, "You know what? Right now, I think I can do that with one shot!"

Just wonder what the kids will look like. And just for the record, I've seen two of the above mentioned.

Tickle Me Tuesday

Well, I feel as though it is time for a new feature here on my blog. So here is the first ever "Tickle Me Tuesday" entry. Every Tuesday, come here for a new joke. Hopefully it tickles you like it does me.

Two elderly gentlemen, who had been without sex for several years, decided they needed to visit a whore house. When they arrived at the house, the Madam took one look at them and decided she wasn't going to waste any of her girls on these two old men. So she used "blow-up" dolls instead. She put a doll in each man's room and left them to their business. After the two men were finished, they started for home and got to talking. The first man said, "I think the girl I had was dead. She never moved, talked or groaned. How was it for you?" The second man replied, "I think mine was a witch." The first man asked, "How's that?" "Well," said the second man, "when I nibbled on her breast, she farted and flew out the window!"

And maybe I will throw in a funny pic every now and then too. As you can see up there, even though the pic was supposed to be down here! Stupid blog.

Fox With The Runs

I'll paint the picture for you. On Fridays, I have to be at work at 6 a.m. That's when I have to be there, not saying that is when I actually start working. See, I spend a lot of time in the back room of the store. Conveniently enough, there is a back door that is close to where I park my car as well as the area that is for employees who smoke to take their breaks. Seeing as how I smoke, I use this area often. Also near this spot is a wooded area that separates the Acme's parking lot from the offices next to it. In said wooded area lives a little grey fox. At first I thought it was a red fox but it had no idea who Lamont or Elizabeth was, so I was apparently mistaken. Well, this past Friday I punched in at 6:03 and then went to the back room as I do every work day. Bill, the guy I work closest with, had a cup of coffee and was already heading for the back door. I quickly follow. We went outside and immediately saw the fox coming out of the small wooded area. We watched as it walked from the tall grass and into the parking lot (I say parking lot but other than employees no one uses the side parking area) and headed towards the area we use for break. The fox walked around the picnic table we sit at to smoke while we take break and then I watched as it almost sat down but not quite and then arched it's back in an oddly familiar way. Suddenly, I realized the fox was taking a crap right near the picnic table. My cell phone was in my car which was between me and the fox. I slowly walked to my car while the fox finished his business, fished my keys out of my pants pocket, and opened my drivers side door. All the while I did not take my eyes off of the fox for more than a second. I didn't actually think I was going to get my phone in time to snap a photo of the fox in mid-poo but I had to keep remembering it's a fox. It would probably just run away from me but I didn't feel like explaining to my boss how I got attacked by a fox 10 minutes after punching in. As expected, sometime during the few seconds I moved my attention from the fox to get my cell phone, the fox finished his potty break and was making his way back to the wooded area. I didn't get a picture of the fox pooing. I didn't even get a photo of the fox. But I did get a picture of the pile of poo. Apparently our little fox has been overdoing it on the fiber. Enjoy and happy Sunday to ya.